See more ideas about Funny photos, Jokes and Transportation. Just a funny trucking picture to brighten your day - Page. What others are saying .. 12 Days Of Trucker Christmas Truck Driver Wife, Truck Drivers, Truckers Girlfriend, Wife. Truck Humor, Truck Memes, Car Memes, Trucker Quotes, Semi Trucks, Big. Open . Truck Driver Wife, Truck Drivers, Truckers Girlfriend, Trucker Quotes, Trucks And Girls, Semi Trucks, Big Trucks, .. Truck Memes, Truck Quotes, Car Jokes. Wild Hogs () Quotes on IMDb: Memorable quotes and exchanges from movies, TV series and more Frank: Oh, man. I wanted to say something funny to her, but all I could think of was black jokes. Dudley Frank: And I got a girlfriend. .. Clerk: Some truck driver must have crapped an entire cow in there, man.
What would bears be without bees? It has way too many drawbacks! Who brings Christmas presents to good little puppies?
Dating a truck driver quotes and jokes - Recent Truck Driver Jobs
Never date a tennis player. Love means nothing to them. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. Why don't some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don't work out.
Do beginner vampires go to batting practice? Since I quit soccer, I've lost my life goals. I lift weights only on Saturday and Sunday because Monday to Friday are weak days.
I'm not a huge fan of archery. It has way too many drawbacks! My snowboarding skills are really going downhill fast! My tennis opponent was not happy with my service. He kept returning it. I quit gymnastics because I was fed up of hanging around the bars. A fisherman tried boxing, but he only threw hooks.
What should you say to impatient jockeys? The race car driver had a pretty checkered past Why was the referee fired? Because he was a whistle blower! Old skiers go downhill fast The weigh-in at the Sumo wrestling championship was a large scale effort.
After a long time waiting for the bowling alley to open, we eventually got the ball rolling. I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually, it came back to me. Refusing to go to the gym counts as resistance training , right? I'm taking part in a stair climbing competition. Guess I better step up my game. Why do soccer players do so well in math? They know how to use their heads! My dog Minton ate all my shuttlecocks.
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball. I tried water polo but my horse drowned To the guy who invented zero: I hate Russian Dolls. They're so full of themselves. I was thinking about getting a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind. I can't understand why people are so bothered about me not knowing what the word 'apocalypse' means. It's not like it's the end of the world!
Where do baby spoons come from? The spork delivers them. The British cannibal enjoyed snacking on fish and chaps. I tried to finish the leftovers, but they had been foiled again. The man's zipper broke, but he fixed it on the fly. Why can't you trust Satan's resume? The devil lies in the details. A hair raising experience sounds promising to a bald man. It was cold in the bedroom so I lay down in the fireplace and slept like a log.
Don't spell 'part' backwards. When I get naked in the bathroom, I usually end up turning on the shower. Why don't cannibals eat clowns. They taste rather funny. I recently got crushed by a pile of books, but I suppose I've only got my shelf to blame. I've decided to sell my vacuum. Well, it was just gathering dust! I was overcharged for velcro last week. What a rip off! I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together.
I've been reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down. Have you heard about the magic tractor? It turned into a field! My first job was at a calendar factory. I can't believe they sacked me, all I did was take a day off! I couldn't work out how to fasten my seatbelt for ages. But then one day, it just clicked. Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? I once got into so much debt that I couldn't even afford my electricity bills, they were the darkest times of my life. I didn't use to like duct-tape at first, but I soon became attached to it. Even the smallest egg farms are multi-layer organizations. I understand how gems were made. The concept is crystal clear to me. The newspaper's rationale for running the story was paper thin. I really wanted a camouflage cap, but I couldn't find one.
I planned to find my watch today, but I didn't have the time. That's why they call him Saint Nick. Why did Santa watch a performance of the Nutcracker at the North Pole? He wanted to see some Pole dancing!
Santa owes a lot to his little helpers. What do you call an elf that runs away from Santa? A rebel without a Claus! Elves are always defending the shape of their ears.
They make some good points. He read an elf-help book! What do you call a reindeer that suddenly forgets how to fly? Did you hear the weather forecast for Christmas Eve? How did Rudolph survive his first trip through the sky?
He held on for deer life! What do you call a ghostly reindeer? Did you know that reindeer like to gather in large groups? Did you hear about the couple whose car broke down on Christmas Eve? They got a mistletow! What does a cranky sheep say at Christmas? Who brings Christmas presents to good little puppies?
What does a festive sheep say at Christmas? What do electricians chant when they meditate? A superconductor walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out! We don't serve your kind here. What kind of car does an electrician drive? If you plant a light bulb in your garden, does it grow into a power plant? This electrician arrives home at 3am. His wife asks him, "Wire you insulate? I'm Ohm, aren't I? Finally, the day had arrived. The chemist was due to go first.
As he strapped him in, the executioner asked him, "Do you have anything you want to say? So the chemist was unstrapped and allowed to walk free. It was the biologist's turn next. As he was being strapped in, the executioner asked him, "Do you have anything you want to say? So, just like the chemist, the biologist was released. Then the electrical engineer was brought forward. The executioner asked him, "Do you have anything you want to say?
If you swap the red and the blue wires over, you might just make this thing work. I used to date a female electrician. She was shocking in bed. His first friend confides to the other two, "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician.
The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren't mine. I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber. The other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn't mine. Paddy sees them looking at him and says, "No, seriously.
The other day I came home early and found a jockey under our bed. It was well wired. I went to my boss at work and said, "I need a raise. Three other companies are after me. Which other companies are after you? I had to call an electrician out today after getting my finger stuck in the socket while trying to plug in my iPhone. I can't believe how much I was charged. Which is the smallest city?
How did Benjamin Franklin feel after discovering electricity? Never trust an electrician with no eyebrows.